Kwi 1969, UJohn martin, umhleli we Ungqatyana omnyama wenze oku kulandelayo umnikelo kuCharles Bukowski ngeleta. Inqaku lalisithi unikwe I-100 yeedola ngenyanga yobomi kumbhali, ukuze awushiye umsebenzi awayewenza ngeloxesha (wayengunoposi e-United States eposa inkonzo kwaye wayesebenza apho kangangeminyaka elishumi elinesihlanu) ukuze azinikele kuphela ekubhaleni. UBukowski, ewe, wasamkela eso sicelo kwaye emva kweminyaka emibini wasiwa kumshicileli Ungqatyana omnyama inoveli yakhe yokuqala "Unoposi".
Ileta
Ileta eyayisiya kuYohane yayifunda ngolu hlobo:
12 Agasti 1986
Molo John:
Enkosi ngeleta. Ngamanye amaxesha akukhathazi kangako ukukhumbula apho sivela khona. Kwaye niyazazi iindawo endivela kuzo. Nabantu abazama ukubhala okanye ukwenza iimuvi ngayo, abayifumani kakuhle. Bayibiza ngokuba "ukusuka kwi-9 kuye kwi-5". Alikho nje u-9 ukuya ku-5. Kwezi ndawo akukho xesha lokutya kwaye, ukuba ufuna ukugcina umsebenzi wakho, awuyi kutya. Kwaye likho ixesha elongezelelekileyo, kodwa ixesha elongezelelekileyo alizange lirekhodwe kakuhle ezincwadini, kwaye ukuba uyakhalaza ngalo likhona elinye icebo lokuzimisela ukuthatha indawo yakho.
Uyayazi intetho yam yakudala: "Ubukhoboka abuzange bupheliswe, kodwa bandisiwe kuphela ukubandakanya yonke imibala."
Into ebuhlungu kukuphulukana nobuntu rhoqo kwabo balwa ukugcina imisebenzi abangayifuniyo kodwa boyika enye into embi. Kwenzeka nje ukuba abantu bazikhuphe. Bayimizimba eneengqondo ezoyikekayo nezithobelayo. Umbala ushiya amehlo akho. Ilizwi alibi. Nomzimba. Iinwele. Ezo. Izihlangu. Yonke into.
Xa ndandimncinci andizange ndikholelwe ukuba abantu banikela ngobomi babo ngokutshintshela loo miqathango. Ngoku ndimdala andikakholwa. Kutheni besenza oko? Ngesondo? Kumabonwakude? Imoto ehlawulwa ngokusisigxina? Eyabantwana? Ngaba ngabantwana abaya kwenza izinto ezifanayo?
Ukusukela oko, xa ndandisemncinci kakhulu kwaye ndingena emsebenzini ndisiya komnye, ndandingenangqondo ngokwaneleyo ukuba ngamanye amaxesha ndikhe ndithi koogxa bam: “Heyi! Umphathi angangena nangaliphi na ixesha asilahle ngaphandle, kanjalo, awuboni?
Inye into abayenzileyo kukundijonga. Wayebanika into ababengafuni ukuyizisa ezingqondweni zabo.
Ngoku, kwishishini, zininzi iindawo zokudilizwa (iintsimbi zentsimbi efile, utshintsho kwezobuchwephesha kunye nezinye iimeko kwindawo yokusebenza). Ukudilizwa kumakhulu amawaka kwaye ubuso babo buyothusa:
"Ndilapha kwiminyaka engama-35 ...".
"Oko akulunganga…".
"Andazi ndithini…".
Amakhoboka awaze ahlawulwe ngokwaneleyo ukuba angakhululeka, kodwa anele nje ukuba aphile kwaye abuyele emsebenzini. Ndiyayibona. Kutheni kungenjalo? Ndiqaphele ukuba ibhentshi lepaki lalilungile, nokuba ukubangumthengisi weebartender kwakulungile. Kutheni ndingabikho kuqala ngaphambi kokuba ndibeke apho? Kutheni ulinde nje?
Ndabhala ndonyanya kuyichasa yonke lonto. Kwakukhululekile ukukhupha yonke into ngaphandle kwenkqubo yam. Kwaye ngoku ndilapha: "umbhali oyingcali." Emva kweminyaka engama-50 yokuqala, ndiye ndafumanisa ukuba kukho ezinye izinto ezicekisekayo ngaphaya kwenkqubo.
Ndikhumbula kanye, ndisebenza njengepakethi kwinkampani yokubonelela ngezibane, omnye woogxa bam ngequbuliso wathi, "Andisoze ndikhululeke!"
Omnye wabaphathi wayehambahamba (igama lakhe lalinguMorrie) kwaye wanika intsini emnandi, onwabele into yokuba lo mfo ubanjisiwe ebomini.
Ke ithamsanqa lokuba ekugqibeleni uphume kwezo ndawo, nokuba zithathe ixesha elingakanani, indinike uhlobo lokonwaba, ulonwabo olonwabisayo lommangaliso. Ndibhala ngoku ndinengqondo endala nomzimba omdala, ixesha elide emva kokuba uninzi lunokukholelwa ekuqhubekeni nale nto, kodwa ukusukela oko ndiqale kade, ndinetyala lokuzingisa, kwaye xa amagama eqala ukusilela kwaye kufuneka ndifumane uncedo Ukunyuka ngezitepsi kwaye andinako ukuxelela itayile kwindawo ephambili, Ndiza kuhlala ndiziva ngathi kukho into engaphakathi kwam eya kuyikhumbula (nokuba sendide ndaya phi) ukuba ndifike njani embindini wokubulala kunye nokudideka kunye nosizi ukuya ubuncinci , ukufa okunesisa.
Ukungabonakalisi ngokupheleleyo ubomi kubonakala kuyimpumelelo, ubuncinci kum.
Inkwenkwe yakho
Hank